A penis saved is a penis earned

It's the second to last day of school, and I couldn't be happier. This entire week has basically been glorified babysitting. In fact, part of my lesson yesterday for my 7th grade math class was one simple problem followed by some math games. I proposed the problem to the class, and the first five kids to bring me their answers, along with justification, won prizes. I called the problem "The Million Dollar Challenge," and it goes like this:

Which would you rather receive?

a) one million dollars, or

b) a penny on January first, and then double that amount every day for a month. (i.e. 2 pennies on January 2nd, 4 pennies on January 3rd, 8 pennies on January 4th, etc...)

If the kids do the math properly, they should end up with something like 10 million dollars on the last day of the month, and most of them were getting answers to that effect.

In my last class of the day, I had a kid come up to me and show me his work, wanting to know if he had earned a prize. This particular kid is a bit of a turd; he's a big kid, mostly quiet, but can be a little bit of a bully and a little bit lazy. He's relatively bright in math, although not so much in his other classes.

There were several kids hanging around me as I looked at this kid's paper. I saw that he had done all of the work, getting to the desired answer of $10,737,000 some-odd dollars.

He had also written a certain word in very large letters on his paper and circled it. I looked at the kid, a little stunned, I asked him, "Eric, why on EARTH did you write the word "PENIS" on your paper?"

Startled, he looked at me, then at some of the other kids, and kind of leaned in close to me and quietly said, "Miss... that's the answer. I circled it because I would pick the pennies."

Pennies... Penis... poor kid can't spell worth a damn.

But the damage was done. My class erupted in laughter and I quickly turned a shocking shade of crimson.

I'm so very glad that school is almost over.